And so, silver lining.
Realising that your life is not turning out to be the way you’d planned, and that the one you love may never get out of the horrible place he’s in, and having to deal with the guilt of wanting to go on with your life anyway. It was bad, tears were shed, dreams were shattered, hearts were stopped for some time.
But here’s what: I want to be happy, like everyone.
I want a job I love, again. I want to be loved. I want great sex every day, and talks, and laughter, and hugs, and fun, and support, and respect, and sharing, and adventure; and being there for someone, and knowing that he will be there for me. I want to go to bed at night knowing that I will wake up with the same man, and that every day can be a new, exciting beginning.
I want a home to go back to.